Whole Beauty Part 5: A Real, Natural Routine

Since my post on using oils for skincare (Skin Revelations), I've received A LOT of questions and interest from friends about oils and natural skin care in general...

It's been about six months since I started changing from commercial beauty products to homemade, homeopathic alternatives.  Looking back, I realize I had to do quite a bit of research to find actual details and methods for making and using natural products.  Obviously, because many of these "products" I now use weren't originally intended to be cosmetic, they don't come with instructions for how to use them this way!  Thankfully I had help from my friend, Lauren (Naked Truth Beauty), but I had so many questions, and had to go to so many different sources to find answers, that it seemed important to try and chronicle a total, real beauty routine from the perspective of a "typical" woman.  Receiving so many questions from friends has only reinforced that idea.  So here is my story, and the gritty details of my daily beauty routine, hopefully answering some questions along the way:

As I switched to natural beauty products, I had some important demands:
1. Nothing gross (I'm not smearing raw eggs in my hair, thank you)
2. They have to work as well, if not better, than the commercial alternative

Because I've had so many problems with my skin over the years, I am extremely wary of trying new things.  Even though my old routine of [Neutrogena Fresh Foaming Cleanser + Cerave cream + Prescriptions] wasn't working (and often left my skin irritated and sad), I was still terrified of changing anything. What if I break out more??  What do dirty hippies know about skincare??  Well, turns out it's been easy to avoid demand #1, and demand #2 has been surpassed.  Hippies might know a thing or two...

For the last six months I have slowly phased out all of my old commercial products, including the prescriptions, and now have a completely natural routine.  I did this one step at a time, first changing cleansers, then moisturizers, and tapering off the prescriptions.  I think it's vital to do this slowly if you have "problematic" skin because a) it's important to isolate what's working, and what to blame if something doesn't work, and b) you have to give your body/face time to adjust.  Slow change is lasting change.

And now to the dirty (clean) details!

My Nighttime Routine

1. Oil Cleansing 
I sang ballads about the benefits of oil in my previous post (Skin Revelations).  Different oils are appropriate for different skin (here is a great blog post on choosing the right oil: Naked Truth Beauty - Choosing Oil).  I use jojoba oil exclusively - I haven't felt the need to blend because this oil alone has worked so beautifully for me

What I use:  Trader Joe's 100% Pure Jojoba Oil.  I store it in a glass stopper bottle I found at Whole Foods, just because I think it makes it easier to pour the oil, and less messy for travel.  I also use a clean baby washcloth (softer than a regular washcloth)

What I do: I use the medicine stopper to pour about this much oil in my (clean) hands...

and I massage this oil directly onto my face, make up and all.  I don't wet my face first because this can interfere with the oil's ability to attract dirt, sebum, and make up.  While I'm gently massaging the oil in, I let the water get hot.  Then I douse the clean washcloth in the hot water, and press the cloth onto my face, allowing the warmth and steam to open my pores.  Then I rinse the washcloth, and gently begin wiping off the make up and oil.  I continue rinsing and wiping until I've removed all my make up.  Then I dry my face with a clean towel.  

If I'm showering at night, I just massage the oil in before I step in the shower, and then use my washcloth as I normally would.

Your skin will not have that dry, tight feeling that I once associated with "clean."  The first time you do this you may have heart palpitations thinking "there's oil all over my face, I'm breaking out right this second!"  Then you discover jojoba oil is better at removing make up and grime than any cleanser you've ever tried, AND your skin is baby soft, glowing, and poreless.  1 point to the hippies.

2. Magical Toner

There are people who have created cults for Apple Cider Vinegar.  They drink it and bathe in it and try to convince you to do the same thing.  Drinking ACV violates demand #1 (nothing gross), because it smells like feet.  But I am happy to put it on my face because the ACV cult did get one thing right, and that's that it's really good for acne-prone skin.  So is Witch Hazel.  People have been using Witch Hazel as a toner for hundreds of years.  It's great for tightening pores and battling acne.  Both ACV and WH are too drying to use on your face alone; however, combined and diluted with water, they make a lovely, gentle toner.  

What I use: 1 part Bragg's Organic ACV, 1 part Humphrey's alcohol-free WH, and 2 parts water.  In an attempt to make this odd concoction smell a little better, I steeped a green tea bag in it.  I'm not sure it made a difference in the smell, but green tea is packed with antioxidants and anti-aging magic, so it can't hurt!  

What I do: Apply a small amount of your homemade toner with a clean cotton or cloth, morning and night, after cleansing.

Depending on how dry or sensitive your skin is, you may or may not feel the need to use a toner at all.  I find it helps keep my skin clear, so I use it morning and night, but I would recommend adding this step in later after you've transitioned cleansers.  

3. Moisturizer

Again, with the oil, Katey!  No but seriously, put oil on your face.  

What I use: Trader Joe's 100% Pure Jojoba Oil, and a small amount of Trader Joe's antioxidant facial moisturizer.  

What I do: I used to use just a few drops of oil all over, but I found that it can take a while for this to absorb.  Because I often go to bed right after this nighttime routine, I was irritated by cat fur or hair sticking my face (violation of demand 1!).  I found that mixing a small amount of this gentle, aloe-based moisturizer  with a few drops of oil makes the oil absorb into my skin much faster. 

Why not just use a moisturizer that already contains oil, you ask?  By mixing it myself, I know exactly what and how much I'm using.  

My Morning Routine

1. Honey Cleansing

Honey is simply wonderful for acne-prone skin.  It is a gentle healing cleanser with natural antibacterial properties.  It helps prevent surface bacteria from becoming an acne infection, and it also helps fade acne hyperpigmentation.  I would highly recommend trying this if you have any struggle with acne, unless of course you are vegan, in which case you may want to try a more bee-friendly option.  

What I use: I always have a pot of Trader Joe's Organic Raw Honey.  It's important to use "raw" honey because this means it hasn't been processed with heat or chemicals, and thus contains the highest amount of natural antibacterial goodness.  I supplement this with another kind of honey, usually sourced from a different geographical location - right now, I'm trying Manuka Honey from New Zealand, which is "so hot right now" in the Honey World.  I mix up my honeys (hehe) because acne is a bacteria and bacteria are tricky and can become resistant to one kind of treatment.  Be smarter than the bacteria!

What I do: I wet my face with warm water, and scoop about a teaspoon of honey into my clean hands.  I warm it in my hands, doing my best to dissolve some of the sugar crystals (you don't want to irritate your face by scratching it with crystals).  Then I spread it on my face and leave it on for about a minute.  I use this time to try to remember what day it is, and where I'm supposed to be... this is challenging in the morning.  Then I gently rinse, and dry.

I follow this up with my ACV-WH toner, and a few drops of jojoba oil as moisturizer.  And make up, wonderful make up.  That's a whole other post.

I don't think I can attribute all of the changes my skin has made to any one part of this routine.  As I've slowly changed out my commercial beauty products for natural ones, I've experienced gradual improvement in all areas I've struggled with (oiliness, acne, irritation, redness, shine, roughness, and any other description of general skin distress you can think of).  My demands were met, and then surpassed, because I also know I'm using products that are better for humans, animals, and the environment.  There is no compromise here, for me, only results.  

I hope this has answered some questions, or helped you consider switching up one or two things in your own routine.  Do you have natural remedies that you rely on?  What changes have you made for the better that you'd want other women to know about?  Fill me in!

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Whole Beauty Part 3: Why I Exercise

Let's get one thing straight: I'm never going to be one of those people who LOVES the gym.  I've never been an athlete.  My parents put me in a wide variety of youth sports, hoping, I think, that I had some hidden talent that could be coaxed out by a professional.  I didn't.  Well actually my "hidden" talent was hiding... at recess so I could quietly read my book instead of being forced to run around in the dirt.  It's so dirty!

Despite an inauspicious beginning, many people grow up to love "being active" - meaning they love to run marathons or hike or do Crossfit (and then post excessively about it on facebook).  I figured I could be one of those people... at least the facebook part...

I do like hiking, especially here in the PNW, but only in the summer when it's not too hot, so that means I like hiking about 2 days per year.

I like yoga, it's relaxing, and kinda fun, in a sweaty sort of way

Ballet is super cool, and it almost tricks me into thinking I'm not working out... almost

Zumba is stupid... #amiright?

Pilates is hard, duh

Conclusion: I seem to get the best workout dancing to Destiny's Child alone in my house

Last fall, I trained for and ran my first 5k, which was a huge accomplishment for me, considering I've never really committed to anything athletic ever in my life. 

I had a running schedule that I actually stuck to, and I went outside (where it's dirty!) and ran 4 days per week for a whole freakin month!  In the rain and shit!  I completed the 5k in about 30 minutes.  I was beat by this dog:

Dammit, Oscar!  (no but seriously, Oscar, I love you).  Regardless, I was extremely proud.  It was the first time I'd really committed to a workout.  And I found that running is the only form of exercise that actually quiets all those annoying voices in my head.

Which brings me to why I workout.  I don't do it because it's fun.  Yah, sure, running can be fun if you can make it to Greenlake and it's a lovely sunny, 68 degree day, and you just got a cute new workout top, and the Usher Pandora mix is picking all the right jamzz.  But I don't love being active.  I love cooking, I LOVE wine tasting, I love reading quietly in my bed... I love love love sitting on my ass sewing all day.  So the only thing that gets me up to go hard for 35 minutes on the treadmill, or make it to that evening yoga class, is because, if I'm working out hard enough, for maybe 10 minutes sometime that day, I have a quiet brain.

Anxiety is a tricky beast.  It often prevents you from doing exactly what will help the most - something new.  I've had an anxious temperament all my life...  I think I came out of the womb asking the doctor, "should we be concerned?"  

I tried running about 3 years ago because a) my mother told me she felt strangely calm every time she went walking, and b) my therapist told me to.  Even though, as a counselor, I extolled the virtues of exercise to every anxious or depressed client I encountered, knowing the research to support it, and really believing it was true, I'd never tried it myself.  Working out was not just a part of who I was.  I couldn't be one of those "gym people" who post "before and after" pictures on Instagram, #humblebragging about how "healthy" and "fit" they feel, when deep inside they're just hoping someone will say "good job" or "you look hot."  Don't front!  We ALL want that sometimes, cause working out IS hard, and they DO look hot!  But I couldn't be that workout girl.  Is it even possible, as a woman, to talk about working out without somehow secretly asking for validation?  "I accept myself for who I am."  "I just workout to be healthy."  "She squats, bro."  What is all this??  No wonder I had so much trepidation about edging into this community..

But then I went for a run.  It sucked.  But afterwards, as I was laying on the my living room floor, sweaty and pissed off, I realized... I wasn't thinking about anything.  

The next day, I went for another run.  Again, nothing.  No thoughts.  

So this is what my husband means when I ask him what he's thinking about and he says, "nothing."  Before this, my mind could not comprehend that a person could ever be thinking about nothing.  You're always thinking about something... right?  There is always something to worry about, at least quietly, in the background, while you're doing other things.  Usually several things.

I kept running.  After a week, I was sleeping through the night (all people don't wake up several times during the night, just thinking about stuff?).  I started doing push ups and sit ups and stretches after the run while I was cooling off, rather than laying on the floor panting thinking, "I can't believe I just went for a stupid run!"  After 2 weeks, my skin looked better (shit, my dermatologist was right).  After a month, I saw defined muscles in the mirror (and briefly thought about posting a before and after pic on Instagram).  Maybe I'm a runner.  No... that's too weird... Here's a pic of me jumping on the bed after NOT working out... #imcool

Since then, I've gone through phases of working out regularly, and other phases of not.  When I find myself freaking out about what to make for dinner, or being 30 seconds late to things, or waking up in the night, "did I call my mom back?" then I ask myself, "have you been working out, eating right, doing things to take care of yourself?"  The lovely thing is that I now know anxiety has a solution, and I will feel better in a week's time if I commit to being active 4 times.  And stop drinking and watching so much Kardashians.

Why do you work out?  

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Whole Beauty Part 2: Skin Revelations

A lot of women I know dislike their skin.  I'm right there with you. 

But I've recently started a new beauty journey, and I want to take you with me!

Those close to me know that I have struggled with problematic skin for over a decade.  Since the age of 13, I've battled oiliness, dryness (yes, both), redness, and seemingly endless breakouts.  So much skin sadness!

There's one refrain heard from anyone who struggles with similar skin issues - "I've tried everything."  When a person says this, I believe her, because I know that she really has tried everything.  Because I really really really have tried everything.

Over the counter products, like Neutrogena, Cetaphil, CeraVe...

Mid-range products, like Clinique, Murad, Philosophy...

TV infomercial products, like Proactiv, Exposed...

"Natural" products, like Burt's Bees, Say Yes, Alba...

Prestige products, like Somme, Dr. Hauschka, Clarisonic...

I have visited the naturopath and tried elimination diets, "liver-cleansing" supplements, herbs and tonics.

I have visited the dermatologist and taken antibiotics, hormone-altering medications, prescription topicals

I have tried benzoyl peroxide, salicylic acid, sea buckthorn, witch hazel, facials, steaming, retinols.  Endless cleansers, toners, moisturizers, masks, tonics, soaks, scrubs, exfoliators, bars, creams, and compresses.

I eat a healthy, balanced diet.  I exercise regularly, and cleanse after.  I drink 8 glasses of water.  I change my towels and pillow cases every other day.  I leave offerings for skin gods.

I have even tried total Acceptance.  Doing nothing - no cleansing, moisturizing, touching, or even thinking too hard about my skin.

Nothing works.

I was still oily or dry, still had excessive redness.  And years of using harsh products made me feel like I was torturing my face.  I knew I just hadn’t found The Key yet – my skin wanted to be healthy, I just didn’t know how to take care of it.

I think about this as a “dark side” to my otherwise very positive feelings about beauty and make up.  And because I love to apply, and read about, and research, and think about make up and beauty products, I’m frequently talking with friends (and strangers) about their beauty routines.  If I see a woman who has beautiful skin, or who has clearly put energy into doing lovely or artistic make up, I want to compliment her and find out her secrets. 

Sometimes a woman with beautiful skin will say something super annoying like, “I eat a lot of blueberries,” or “Ponds cold cream.”  And we both know that most of us average Janes could eat a flat of blueberries and bathe in Ponds and still not have the same genetically-blessed flawless finish.

And then sometimes you talk to someone who has battled all the same issues as you, who has also tried everything, and then found The Key, and come out on the other side with lovely, healthy, glowing skin.  And she wants to share all of her secrets!  And she starts a blog to tell other women about all the toxins in their beauty products, and how they can transform their skin, and help the environment, just by doing what’s natural.  And she’s so effing gorgeous you will do whatever she says.  That’s my friend, Lauren Evashenk, and her awesome blog Naked Truth Beauty.

Lauren’s Key, and my Skin Revelation, is the magic of oil.  In particular, for me, pure jojoba oil.  Get the full story in her post.  As she explains, oil is the most perfect skin nourishment.  Jojoba in particular is chemically identical to the oil our skin naturally produces (sebum).  Thus when we use it, our skin recognizes it as its own moisture – a friendly beast that need not be battled with inflammation.  Not only that, but oil can be used as a cleanser as well.  Jojoba oil removes excess oil from your skin (it makes sense, oil removes oil), and draws impurities out of your pores, without disrupting the chemical balance of your face.

I’ve learned that using common beauty products starts a vicious cycle.  Cleansers and toners remove our skin’s natural oils.  We moisturize with water-based, oil-free creams and lotions to counteract the dryness from the cleanser.  However, our skin still senses its been stripped of its own moisture, and starts to produce more sebum.  The excess sebum causes our pores to enlarge, and often become infected with acne.  We’ve cleansed and moisturized, but our skin is either dry or oily (or both).  Then we use more products to try to kill the acne bacteria.  We exfoliate to slough off the layers of dead skin that accumulate from all these harsh treatments.  It seems like no matter what we do, our skin is shiny, dull, lifeless, patchy, and broken out. 

Lauren points out how this cycle produces a reliance on commercial beauty products.  Those with “problem skin” need to use “oil free” products because, we’re told, oil is the enemy and will make you break out.  While its true that not all oils are appropriate for your face (read about that here), it can actually be the solution to many of the problems it purportedly causes.

And the best part?  A 4oz bottle of pure jojoba oil from Trader Joe’s is $8.  I’ve paid more money just to talk about skin care. 

So let’s get real, does this work? 

It may not be the solution to every single problem your skin presents.  I don’t (yet) believe that oil alone will alleviate the worst breakouts.  I recognize that acne is, at its core, a bacterial infection that may have to be treated medically.  I’m not saying fire your dermatologist. 

But I am saying that, given the best treatment, skin wants to be healthy, and healthy is beautiful.  When I use oil, my pores diminish, my skin is plump, and I’m neither shiny nor dry.  I don’t know if anyone is stopping me on the street yet to say, “Hey gorgeous, what’s your routine?”  But for the first time in about 15 years, I like my skin.  My new routine is using oil, accepting flaws, celebrating health, and taking care of myself.  Oh and mascara.  I really like mascara.

More to come on make up and beauty in my next post!

Thank you for reading!  Have you subscribed to my posts yet? Click on the left to get in on the action.  And if you think your friends would like it, share my posts on Facebook, Pinterest, or Twitter.

For more recipes, photos, and thoughts on life, follow me on Pinterest,  Instagram, and Twitter!  While you’re at it, follow Lauren on her blog Naked Truth Beauty.  Can’t get enough!

XOXO

Women at the Nail Salon

I think I'm probably a "middle maintenance" type woman.  By that I mean I'm somewhere in between having a personal stylist and wearing yoga pants to the movies.  I wear make up every day.  But not to the gym.  I value nice things.  But sometimes I make them myself, or buy them secondhand.  I love nature.  But I hate camping (sorry, Nicolai, the truth comes out...).

But I think the most high-maintenance, vanity-focused thing I do is get my nails manicured every 2 weeks... (and I took this selfie for my Nail Salon post, that's pretty vanity-focused... but when will I ever be this young and Instagram-filtered again???)

The nail salon is a fantastic place to watch and think about people.  Manicurists are usually skilled at picking up what type of person you are pretty quickly.... There's a kind of salon etiquette code ... They ask you a few questions, and if you respond briefly, that means you're comfortable (or relieved) to just sit quietly.  If you're chatty, then they have a whole arsenal of inquiries.  Lots of women will tell their manicurist things they wouldn't tell their best friend.  In my experience, manicurists also seem to have an amazing ability to remember minute details of their clients' lives.  This impresses me because, most of the time, I can't remember what day it is.

Unless I'm with a friend, I'm in the quiet camp.  With the work I do, sometimes it's relieving to be silent for an hour... I think my manicurist may feel the same way because she listens to people all day, too.

As an added bonus, being silent allows for some good, quality eavesdropping.  90% of people coming to the nail salon are women in groups.  And despite the fact that we're all in public, all of these women use the nail salon as time to dish the dirtiest dirt.  All of them.  There is a magical "truth or dare" portal at the door to the salon, but you can only choose "truth."  And even though there are four other groups of women half-eavesdropping on your conversation, there's as much Real Talk happening as a Charles Shaw-fueled slumber party.

I think it's wonderful that women do this.  I think it's completely awesome that we've all made a silent agreement that the nail salon is "our place" and we can talk about whatever we want.

But it's also a little unsettling, sometimes, when 90% of the conversation I hear is women talking about other women.  Men always think we're thinking about them, but the nail salon proves this is completely false.  We think about ourselves, and other women.  It's not always negative, but a lot of the time it is. It makes me think about a strange paradox.

The nail salon is one place I've seen that women have claimed, where we can talk about whatever we want.  It's hard out there for a woman, still.  There is still inequality in our day to day lives.  Raise your hand if you've been asked if you need "help" with something today.  Yet so often when we can talk without fear of being harassed or belittled, we're so often belittling each other.  Why do we do this?

I've read that because it's so hard for women to achieve a sense of secure confidence in this society, that gossip is one way of ensuring a continued position of power.  I've read that it's relational aggression instilled from a young age when we were taught we couldn't fight with fists.  I've read that gossip is one way of communicating trust and a special relationship, of ensuring group membership.  I've read that, particularly in America, women need more reassurance that their feelings, particularly difficult ones like anger or resentment towards others, are "correct," and gossip is one way of eliciting that.

I've also read that it's just fun to talk shit sometimes.  I pass through that "truth" portal, too, and I'm the one eavesdropping on all the good stories about what slutty thing Stacey did at the bar last night.  But I feel guilty for enjoying it.  Probably no one should be calling Stacey slutty.  Aren't we judged enough by men and strangers?

I'm reassured when I remember that most of this gossip is harmless.  And I remember that I've chosen friends who would include me in any hilarious conversation of my slutty-ness.  Stacey's probably laughing at herself, too.  If I do something dumb, mean, or ridiculous, I sort of hope my friends would talk about it.  Maybe our ability to talk so candidly about each other, in the nail salon and elsewhere, is one thing that makes being a woman extremely cool.  

Can we say we've "reclaimed" some of the names and stereotypes used against us?  Would being kinder to each other change how we're treated in the world?  Or maybe we just need the nail salon to get it all out.

Either way, I'll be back in 2 weeks.  I think I'll go with pink.